These days my mind began to wander about and doubted what job could suit me. And then the answer came out still “doctor”, which was far away a dream, though, because my major is international communication and journalism in Beijing Foreign Studies University. i began to think about it because i read a textbook from john...
However, I can’t blame anybody, including myself and my mother. I don’t realize the existence during the past nineteen years because of the upper hand my mother put upon. You can’t believe that there could be a girl never choosing her own underclothes, never deciding her cosmetics and never arguing for her dream to be a doctor when the mother decided her to be a journalist, which she loathed deep, let alone the other big issues. I am not able to decide, choose and protest. So, I can’t blame such a disable fool. Contradictorily, I can’t blame mother because she make those excellent decisions out of her love to me. How dare I blame a person loving me so much!
And now, I don’t know what to do, without anybody understanding me. The only human being once understood me is the most distant one in my world, dreaming her daughter will became a great woman soon. Others, busy doing their own business, don’t have the obligation to listen to my useless complaint. Madly, lonely, insensitively, I can only be suffering while wrenching myself ahead.
Actually, I am inclined to give up. But, what will be left for me without my aimless struggle.
At least, now, I have a so-called promising future and my mother can be proud of my so-called achievement.
A person who once loses the ego, or never has the ego, can do nothing that makes him or her happy. His or her whole life is destined for failure and pain.